Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You are the jesus of drinking
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
