Screwed.edu
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
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