wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Watching her eat just hurts me
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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