who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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