What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize