Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
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