I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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