If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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