I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
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