I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
