I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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