when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
