you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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