He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
