Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize