Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
