I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
