Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
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