Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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