Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
