i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize