No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
