i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
