Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
