girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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