Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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