The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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