She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
