their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Randomize
