this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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