help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
