Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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