Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
please don't ironically join a cult
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