I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Houston, we have a squirter
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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