I wish i was in the wii world.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
