Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
