You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize