Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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