I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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