that's an acceptable place to lick
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize