Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
This is my gift to your gina
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
