okay pat passed out under dana's car
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
