I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
