I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
