my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
