69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
