North Korea, Best Korea!
I met the friendliest cop last night
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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