Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
