Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
