lets start a swedish sibling band together
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
