turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize